


Being in love with your mortal enemy is only acceptable when you're under a spell.

by andonewillbringhisfall



Category: Carry On - Rainbow Rowell, Simon Snow & Related Fandoms
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-02
Updated: 2018-02-02
Packaged: 2019-03-12 15:37:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,528
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13550343
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/andonewillbringhisfall/pseuds/andonewillbringhisfall
Summary: Penny creates a love spell, but needs someone to test it out on. Simon identifies the perfect target.





	Being in love with your mortal enemy is only acceptable when you're under a spell.

**Author's Note:**

> Not sure what is going on with the title of this fic but anyway... here's a relatively old fic reposted from my Tumblr.

SIMON:

‘I think I’ve finally got it,’ Penny announces while we’re at the breakfast table.

‘Got what?’ I mumble, mouth full of bagel.

‘My spell. I’ve finally decided what to do for my assignment.’

‘Yeah? What?’ I personally haven’t been able to think of anything. Unless there’s a spell for creating sour cherry scones or magickally disappearing Baz from a room, I haven’t found any inspiration.

‘A love spell,’ Penny says triumphantly.

I pause mid-chew. ‘Uh, aren’t those really hard though? And don’t they already exist?’

‘Yes to both questions, but the idea is to create one that isn’t that difficult to perform and that chooses its own target so you don’t have to figure out the matchmaking yourself.’

I swallow and reach for another bagel. ‘Right, sounds cool, but how are you going to test it out?’

Penny frowns. ‘That’s the thing I’m still not sure about. The consequences could be really awkward if it doesn’t work as planned.’

‘So what will you do?’

She rolls her eyes. ‘You don’t have to chew and talk simultaneously, Si, seriously. Anyway, I just have to pick someone I don’t mind experimenting on.’ Her gaze travels to Trixie the pixie.

‘Don’t pick Trixie. You could ruin her relationship.’

‘Exactly. Then I might have some peace and quiet in my room for once.’

‘Penny, no. We have to pick someone we don’t care about. Someone evil.’ The possibilities start racing through my mind. Maybe Baz would leave me alone if Penny made him fall in love with some poor sod. Plus it’d be really fun to watch. And best of all, if Penny’s attempted spells have any weird side effects (such as death. That would be good.) Baz would deserve every second of it.

‘Hm,’ Penny says, not bothering to ask who I’m referring to. ‘He  _has_  always been single…’

‘True. You’d be helping him out,’ I say encouragingly. Not like I have ulterior motives or anything.

‘Well, I don’t know about that, but he does seem to be the ideal target. If he starts showing feelings for someone, I’ll definitely know my spell works.’

I nod. ‘Yes. Exactly.’

I can’t wait to see this.

 

BAZ:

Bunce is as moronic as Snow if she thinks I haven’t noticed her mumbling love spells. I’ve seen the books she’s been reading in the library and I’ve eavesdropped on some of their conversations. I figured out ages ago that her spell for the eighth year assignment is going to be a love spell, if she can pull it off. I was a little slower to realise that I was the chosen target for the spell, but by the time Bunce decided to go for it, I had already reached the conclusion that it’s for my own good. If Bunce’s spell actually works, maybe I’ll be in love with someone other than Snow. Literally anyone else would be an improvement.

So I let Bunce get to me and I kept my head down as she pointed her ring finger at me and I stayed perfectly quiet and still as she cast a quote from an old movie. I could see this glow coming out of her ring and I caught a distinct whiff of something sweet like roses and fairy floss, and I know she sensed it too, and I think we both thought the spell was working. But then the feeling was gone and what do you know, I’m still in love with Simon Snow.

Snow looks up when I walk into our room that evening. He’s already changed and he’s sitting up on his bed reading a book. I feel his suspicious gaze follow me as I move around the room. I try to stare him down, but he just keeps scrutinising me.

‘What do you want, Snow?’ I ask finally.

He shakes his head. ‘Nothing.’ He looks down at his book for a moment before adding, ‘just wondering if you feel any… different.’

I’m distracted for a moment, counting the moles on his cheek, my eyes measuring the exact distance between them.

I shake my head to clear it. ‘Like what, I suddenly don’t want to end your life?’ Or I suddenly want to leap across the room and snog you, I think, but don’t say.

Crowley, that’s actually a good idea. Snow will think I’m under Bunce’s love spell and then I can do and say whatever I want to him and once it’s all over I can just blame her, push him down the stairs again to express my disgust, and we can go on scowling at each other and he’ll be none the wiser.

Snow sighs loudly. ‘I shouldn’t have expected anything non-villainous to come out of your mouth.’

The more I think about this idea, the more I like it. I could just walk up to him right now and kiss those moles like I’ve always wanted, and Snow would just write it off as the spell. I could finally touch him without ruining either my dignity or my sanity.

Only, if I did that Snow would shove me off of him in a heartbeat.

‘I’m so predictable, yet you never learn,’ I say to a still-fuming Snow and head into the bathroom. I close the door behind me and lean against it, still pondering this idea. What if I just let go? If I just stopped pretending that I hate him and I allowed myself to react the way I want to when he’s around? It would be nice not to have to come up with snarky comments and force myself to be constantly sneering and putting him down. It would be nice to just stare openly when he’s around, and to say out loud how I feel about him, just for a little while. No strings attached; no utter mortification and humiliation. Just a little discomfort on Snow’s part, probably. It could be seriously cathartic.

I get changed before coming back out and sitting on my bed. Snow has gone to sleep, curled to face the wall away from me. I can see the thin gold chain glinting on the bare skin of his neck. I sigh and turn my gaze to the window.

I should do it. I should be truthful to Snow, just while he thinks it means nothing. I’m so tired of prodding him and taunting him when all I want to do is hold him and tell him he’s brighter than all the stars in the universe.

While I’m lost in thought I realise Snow is looking at me. I glance at him then turn back to the window.

‘What are you thinking about?’ he asks. ‘Or who?’ I hear the smirk in his voice.

I answer him honestly.

‘You.’

 

SIMON:

I sigh loudly and turn over to face the wall again. Seriously, he’s plotting against me by moonlight while staring out the window, instead of either going to sleep like a normal person, or daydreaming about some pitiful love like he should be. And he has the audacity to admit to his villainous activities.

Penny asks me for an update the following morning.

‘So? Any unusual activity?’

‘No,’ I say. ‘He was up at night plotting. Which is definitely not considered unusual activity.’

‘How do you know he was plotting? Maybe he was writing love poetry.’ She wrinkles her nose at the suggestion.

‘Nah, he was just sitting there staring out the window. And I know he was plotting ‘cause he told me.’

‘What? Why would he tell you?’

I think back over last night’s short-lived conversation. ‘Well, he didn’t actually tell me that he was plotting exactly. I asked who he was thinking about and he said me. Hence: plotting.’

‘Unless,’ Penny says, starting to giggle. ‘He was actually thinking about you. As in, the spell worked, and now Baz is in love with –’

‘No!’ I push back my chair. ‘No way, Penny. Don’t even finish that sentence.’

‘No, seriously, Si, what if it’s true?’ She says this through a fit of laughter.

‘He also said something about wanting to end my life last night, so I don’t think so.’ I make a face at her. She won’t stop laughing. ‘Honestly, Pen, the idea is preposterous.’

‘You’re right,’ she says, giggling. ‘That doesn’t make it any less amusing.’

I roll my eyes and start walking towards class. ‘He doesn’t seem like the type who would go really crazy obvious if he had feelings for someone,’ I say. ‘We might have to wait a while before we notice any effects.’

She takes her seat on my left and we both look towards Baz, who’s sitting a couple rows behind us. He meets my gaze unflinchingly as always, and I look away and lean across to whisper to Penny.

‘So how does the spell get undone? Does it just wear off or have you figured out something to reverse it?’

‘According to my research, it should either wear off naturally if it’s unrequited, or it can grow into the real thing. But I don’t know. This is why we’re experimenting.’

I sit back upright in my chair as the class begins, but I’m distracted. (I’m not the most focused person even on a good day.) I keep glancing back at Baz and trying to catch him doing any suspicious glassy-eyed gazing, but like I said, he probably wouldn’t be that obvious about it. The third time I glance back, I find him looking straight at me.

For once Baz isn’t glaring. He’s just watching me, his elbow resting on the table and his chin cupped in his hand. I hold his gaze for as long as I can before I’m too unsettled and I turn back around. What’s with the lack of murderous intent in his eyes?

‘Simon,’ Penny whispers, and I glance over at her. There’s an awed expression on her face. ‘He’s staring at you.’

Slowly I turn around. Baz is still in the same position, eyes fixed on mine. He doesn’t move a muscle.

This is getting exceedingly weird. I’m conscious of my heartrate speeding up as I turn back to Penny.

‘I might be an actual genius,’ she continues whispering. ‘If I can make Tyrannus Basilton Grimm-Pitch fall for  _you_ , of all people. I can’t believe it. My spell is freaking brilliant.’

‘No way,’ I whisper back furiously. ‘Merlin and Morgana, there is absolutely no way that’s actually what’s happening.’

‘You’re blushing, Simon Snow,’ Penny says, giggling madly. ‘Crowley, Simon, you’re as red as a dragon’s breath.’

I shake my head and turn to face the front, refusing to look behind me for the rest of the lesson. I don’t know why Penny got this idea into her head, but honestly, she must be completely loopy. Baz is most likely just plotting.

 

BAZ:

This is going better than I thought. I feel oddly relieved, like I’ve been freed of some great burden. Plus it’s clearly making Snow really uncomfortable, and I love watching him squirm.

The following morning I’m woken up by the sound of Snow banging around in the bathroom (he never tries to be quiet even when he knows I’m sleeping; and I’ve never asked him to, because I suspect he would do the opposite just to spite me). I sit up groggily just as he comes back in the room, wet curls plastered to his forehead. Every time I see him after a shower I just want to run my fingers through those curls and smooth them back into place.

This morning I don’t restrain myself. I stand up and walk right up to Snow on his side of the room, where I usually don’t venture. He takes a tiny step back as I reach for him, like he thinks I’m going to try to hurt him, and then freezes completely as soon as my fingertips touch his hair.

Gently, I brush the loose curls aside. There. Snow’s wide blue eyes threaten to root me to the spot and I move away before I can get too lost. I head to the bathroom, all too conscious of Snow’s confused gaze trailing behind me.

He let me touch him. Simon let me touch him, and it’s probably just because he was taken by surprise and he didn’t know what was happening, but he didn’t push me away.

He hasn’t left yet when I come out, which is also unusual. He looks up and watches me walk in.

‘Uh…’

‘Your shirt is on back to front,’ I say. Typical Snow. And why do I find that so endearing?

‘Oh. Right.’ Hastily he attempts to wriggle out of the shirt. ‘Thanks,’ he adds like an afterthought while his head is still stuck in the shirt.

Now I’m staring at the moles scattered like stars on his back and I don’t force myself to look away. I even sigh, just a little bit, but then I instantly regret it.

Snow still has his back to me as he picks up his tie and loops it around his neck. He heads towards the mirror, which he still needs after all these years, and the tie always ends up lopsided anyway. I see him fumbling with the tie and before I can think it through, I move to stand next to him and when he turns around, I reach for the tie and deftly do it up. Like before, Snow just stands there and lets me do it.

‘There you go,’ I say quietly, tugging on the tie to straighten it, and Crowley, I think my face is going red. A quick glance in the mirror confirms this. I’m standing  _this close_  to Snow and he’s looking up at me and my fingers are hovering near his chest, and now I know for sure that it’s too late. Even Snow isn’t  _that_  oblivious; he knows exactly how I feel.

And it’s terrifying, even with the love spell excuse saving me from any real harm to my dignity. He could still push me away. He could still run as far away as possible, disgusted by my affection.

Head down, I drop his tie and walk quickly out of the room.

 

SIMON:

I think I’m going to start hyperventilating. Penny was right. Oh Jesus Christ, Penny was right, Baz is in love with me. This is  _not_  happening, there is no  _way_  this is happening. But I can’t deny the evidence staring me in the face. When he touched my hair. And then I took my shirt off and he went all dreamy on me. It was the weirdest thing  _ever_. And now, with the tie, he was  _blushing_. So I have no choice but to conclude that Baz Pitch is in love with me.

I mean, he’s not really in love with me. He just thinks he is, because of Penny’s spell. Probably the spell will wear off soon enough and then he will come up with the scheme of all evil schemes to end me once and for all to make up for it. Oh God, Baz is going to seriously despise me after this. Not that it’s my fault! Though I was the one who suggested that Penny should use the spell on him.

But seriously! Baz Pitch is in love with me! The world has officially gone mad. Just now, when he left the room, he was acting all flustered and embarrassed like a schoolboy with a massive crush. It was actually kind of cute. I can’t believe this is happening.

Penny is waiting for me at breakfast.

‘Oh God, oh my God, oh my God,’ I say.

She raises her eyebrows. ‘Swearing like a Normal. Uh-oh.’

‘You were right.’

‘Aren’t I always?’

‘Yes. Oh God. Penny, he’s in love with me, like you said.’

‘You sound traumatised. What did he do?’ She starts giggling again.

‘Nothing like  _that!_ ’ I say, nudging her with my elbow. ‘What do I do?’

‘Well, that’s up to you,’ she says, pulling a serious face, ‘I mean, if you don’t feel the same way –’

‘Of course I don’t!’ I splutter.

‘Wait, I need to take notes,’ she says, pulling a notebook out of her pocket. ‘For research purposes, obviously.’ She pulls out a pen and turns in her seat so her whole body is facing me. ‘Tell me everything.’

But it’s hard to tell Penny everything when I’m conscious of Baz sitting at the next table, staring at me. (The staring is getting seriously creepy. He needs to stop.) Suddenly I’m self-conscious of the way I’m shovelling food in my mouth, dropping half of it on the table in the process. But who cares? Normally Baz would be giving me his most disdainful sneer, but now he’s been spelled to find my awful manners enchanting. This is actually hilarious.

‘This is interesting,’ Penny says, still scribbling as she lifts her head to glance at Baz. ‘We established that Baz isn’t the type who would be really obvious about it if he had feelings for someone, yet here he is staring openly at you pretty much 24/7. This means that my spell doesn’t just give you feelings for someone but also makes you go gaga over them.’

‘As all good love spells should do.’

Penny looks back at her notebook and snaps it shut, satisfied with her notes. ‘Well, it probably means it doesn’t go very deep, so it should wear off soon. You’ll be glad when that happens, right?’

‘Yeah. At least evil plotting Baz was more predictable.’

Case in point: we’re practicing spells for elocution class and no matter how many times I try, I can’t seem to get the air around me to cool down and soon enough I can feel my magic bubbling up under my skin, almost giving off sparks, like it does when I’m about to go off. Then suddenly Baz is next to me and I expect him to tease me, poking and prodding until I go off so he can stand back and watch (and even when it’s entirely his fault, I always protect him from the explosion) but instead, he speaks softly.

‘Snow, it’s all right, look at me.’ I do, turning my head to stare up into those grey eyes. I think it’s just the magic coursing through me that’s making me see everything in a sharper focus, but it seems like he’s never looked so alive. His eyes are bright and focused and up close, I can make out the details of his eyelashes brushing against his pale skin.

‘Put your wand down on the desk.’ Again, I just do what he asks. ‘Now take a deep breath.’ His eyes are still focused on mine, steadying me. ‘See? It’s all right. You’ll figure out the spell; you just need to take it slow.’ Crowley, it’s actually working. My breathing is coming easier and it no longer feels like I’m about to set something on fire.

He picks up my wand and holds it out to me. I take it, and when I cast the spell again I immediately feel a cool breeze on my face.

‘See? You can do magic just fine, Snow.’

‘Why are you helping me?’ I blurt out.

He meets my gaze. ‘I think you know why.’

 

BAZ:

To my surprise, once Snow gets used to it, he doesn’t seem to mind me being in love with him. The first few times I greet him in a friendly manner in the mornings or in between classes, he does a double take and then stammers out a greeting in return just a beat too late. Every time he sees me staring he turns away immediately, his face flushed, mumbling to himself or to Bunce. Every time I walk in the room he straightens up and gives me his usual suspicious stare, but when he sees that I’m not about to attack him he immediately relaxes. He probably thinks the spell is going to wear off at any moment, but I’ve been hopelessly in love with him for years now and if he and Bunce don’t come up with a supposed cure, he’s going to be waiting for a long time.

I’m feeling too elated to ever want to stop doing this. It’s going to be so hard to go back to pretending to hate him when Bunce decides to reverse the spell. I’m all too aware of the fact that ever since she (tried to) cast the spell on me, Snow has never once pushed me away. He has never once responded to anything I said with a snide remark, ever since he realised how I feel. He hasn’t tried to use it to hurt me and he’s never even recoiled when I reached out to touch him. I guess that because he thinks I’m under a spell, he doesn’t think it counts as me being myself, so I shouldn’t be too happy about it. But I can’t help it. Every second that I stare at him, I know I’m digging myself a deeper hole and making it harder for my future self to live through the rest of the year, but I’m so far gone that I can’t bring myself to care.

I’m heading up the stairs to our room one evening after class when I hear his footsteps coming up behind me (he’s so noisy).

I turn around and flatten myself against the wall.

‘Snow.’

‘Baz,’ he says, stopping a few steps below me and giving me his usual scrutinising look. When he seems satisfied that I haven’t gone back to hating him, he keeps climbing, brushing past me on the way up to the room. ‘I need your help.’

I raise an eyebrow.

‘I mean, if you could, it would be nice, would you help me with elocution? Please,’ he stammers.

‘Of course,’ I say immediately, following him into the room.

‘You – really?’

‘Really,’ I smirk. (Only then it occurs to me that he’s just using me because he thinks I’m under a spell. Which kind of makes me want to turn around and march back down the stairs, but I probably won’t ever get a chance to do this again, so I stay.)

‘What do you need help with?’ I ask, sitting down on my bed.

He sits across from me and sighs. ‘Everything. It’s like I’m stuck at the level of a third year.’

‘Okay. We’ll take it from there then.’ I find a clean sock and place it on the floor between us. ‘Send it flying.’

He gives me a look. ‘Come on, Baz, give me a tiny bit of credit. I can do  _that_.’

‘I know. We’re taking it slow, okay? Go on.’

He sighs and picks up his wand. ‘ **Up, up and away!** ’ The sock goes flying at my face.

‘Anathema!’ I exclaim, ducking out of the way just in time.

‘It’s a sock, for Merlin’s sake.’

I roll my eyes, then stand up and scoot over to sit next to Snow on his bed, before I can think better of it. ‘Okay. Now set the sock on fire.’

‘What?’

‘Just do it.’

He does, keeping the sock floating in the air at least a metre away from us.

‘You can bring it closer. It won’t bite,’ I say.

‘But you’re flammable. I’m being careful.’

I swallow, and don’t answer. ‘Now put it out.’

‘ **Make a wish**.’

The flame goes out and a cloud of dust falls onto the floor.

‘ **As you were** ,’ Snow casts, and the sock forms again.

‘Okay, that was just a warm up,’ I say. ‘Now let’s try some of the heating and cooling spells from class.’

He starts changing the temperature of the air around us, and I feel it on my skin.

‘Good,’ I say, briefly letting my hand rest on his shoulder. ‘Do you want to try some of the spells from last week?’

‘Okay,’ Snow says. Soon we’re standing side by side painting illusions on the walls. Snow creates dragons and mountains and the castle. I make an image of the Wavering Wood in near-darkness, lit by the burning orange glow of the setting sun. I can feel the magic crackling all around us; Snow’s magic, smelling of burning wood and brimstone, and my magic, mingling in the air.

‘I’m getting drunk on magic,’ Snow says, collapsing onto the bed.

‘It’s  _your_  magic,’ I say. ‘It radiates off you like electricity.’

‘I can’t control it,’ he says, and giggles, pointing his wand at me. ‘ **Up, up and away!** ’

‘ **Settle down** ,’ I say quickly, pointing at my own feet so they float back down to the ground. I lean forward and gently shove him in the chest. He falls on his back and points his wand at the ceiling.

‘ **Twinkle twinkle little star** ,’ he says, and suddenly we’re in darkness lit by pinpoints of light, like we’re floating in a starry sky. Snow is watching the stars, but I’m watching him (the sun; the brightest star. The centre of my universe). I want to kiss him. I almost do. Instead, I shove him off the bed, and the stars surrounding us blink out all at once.

‘What did you do that for?’ he asks lazily, then sits up suddenly, looking at me with alarm. ‘Is the spell gone?’

I slide off the bed and cross my legs, leaning against the side of his bed. ‘No. There is no spell,’ I say.

‘Yeah… there is,’ he mumbles, and leans back, closing his eyes. His shoulder bumps against mine, and neither of us moves.

 

SIMON:

The Baz who has been spelled to be in love with me is way nicer than the normal Baz.

I can’t remember the last time I felt this happy.

If only it wasn’t for that pesky little spell.

 

BAZ:

I’m contemplating walking across to join Snow and his friends for breakfast when Dev and Niall confront me.

‘This is an intervention,’ Dev says.

‘Why are you being  _nice_  to Snow?’ Niall asks.

‘Ah…’ It was too much to hope that they would let me get away with it. I’ve taught them too well.

‘Furthermore,’ Dev continues. ‘You’ve been  _staring_  at him.’

‘Almost as if you’re  _in love_  with him.’

‘What the actual fuck, Baz?’

I grimace. ‘I’m under a spell,’ I lie. ‘It’s all Bunce’s fault, okay? Everything will go back to normal soon enough.’

 

SIMON:

‘Uh, Si,’ Penny says, bursting into the room while I’m at the window, watching Baz out on the pitch. I realise I can barely see him anymore in the fading light; who knows how long I’ve been standing here, almost in a trance. I yawn and stretch my arms.

‘Pen, you know you can’t be in here.’

‘This is kind of important. Besides, Baz won’t turn me in as long as you ask him with your prettiest smile.’

I roll my eyes. (I’m blushing.) ‘What’s up? Did something happen?’

‘Yes. My notebook is gone. The one I wrote all the notes in for the spell.’

‘Gone? Did you lose it? Did you check your room?’

‘Of course I checked my room. And I used every spell I could think of to look for it, until one of them led me to Dev and Niall’s room. Which leads me to my next point…’ She sits down on Baz’s bed (even though I’ve told her countless times that he’d hate that) and leans forward, chin cupped in her hands, searching my face for something.

‘What?’

‘Did you notice anyone coming into the room earlier?’

‘…No, why?’

‘I think there’s a slight possibility that Dev or Niall may have snuck up here and used my spell on you,’ she says, biting her lip while she waits for me to react.

I’m not too sure how I should react. ‘… Oh.’

‘Do you feel anything?’ she asks, hand flying to her pocket. ‘Argh. I haven’t got my notebook.’

‘No, I mean, I don’t think so.’

‘Okay, maybe they didn’t get you,’ she says hopefully. ‘Or maybe the feeling sneaks up on you. Let me know if something changes.’ She hops up and heads to the door, suddenly in a hurry. ‘And don’t worry; I’m sure it’ll be fine.’

I stand up and start pacing the room. I know Baz is about to come in because Penny always seems to know instinctively when to go before she gets caught. I can feel my heart beating faster and my magic start to prickle in my fingertips.

I hope Penny’s wrong. I mean, poor Baz, right? It wouldn’t be very fun for him if I started acting lovesick over some random person.

I reach for the necklace around my neck, blindly fumbling with it, before finally just snapping the delicate chain. I stare at the golden cross in my hands.

The door swings open and I jump, dropping the necklace.

‘You took off your cross,’ Baz says, some emotion in his voice that I can’t quite name.

‘Y-yeah,’ I say, bending down to scoop it up off the floor. I open the drawer in the bedside table and drop the necklace in there. ‘Hey, do you happen to know what your friends were up to for the last hour or so? I mean, do they plot without you?’

He gives me a look. ‘You think we spend all our spare time plotting against you? The world doesn’t revolve around you, Simon. Well. Mostly it doesn’t.’

My heart skips a beat. ‘Did you just call me Simon?’

Baz shrugs. ‘So?’ He walks over to sit on his bed and starts unlacing his shoes.

‘Uh…’ I feel the heat rush to my face. Again. ‘Say it again.’

‘Why?’

‘I, I don’t know. I liked it.’

‘Simon.’

I sit down on my bed. What is it about Baz saying my name that’s making my knees give out?

‘Baz, I, look, I need to tell you something.’

He carefully sets his second shoe on the floor and laces his fingers together. Then he lifts his head to meet my eyes.

‘What? Simon?’

What if I tell him that he’s just under a spell, and what he’s feeling is a lie, and then that breaks the spell and he goes back to hating me? At first this was funny and I sort of preferred the normalcy of the old Baz, but Crowley, I actually really like the roommate I’ve got now. I would miss him.

‘It’s just a spell,’ I blurt out. ‘What you’re…’ I wave my hands around vaguely above my head, not able to put a name to it out loud. ‘… Feeling.’

Baz shakes his head. ‘I already told you, Simon, it’s not a spell.’

 

BAZ:

I keep saying his name. Simon. Just to watch that something flare in his eyes every time I say it.

He still thinks I’m under a spell.

Crowley, I wish I was.

 

SIMON:

Baz is under a spell but he’s completely oblivious and now I might be under a spell too, except I still don’t know who the spell is going to target, and now I suddenly feel like maybe I really don’t hate Baz, while his real self is still lurking in there somewhere just waiting to absolutely destroy me. (He’s going to be so mortified by his own behaviour. And there’s a 100% guarantee that he’ll take it out on me.) What a mess. I need to talk to Penny.

‘Penny, do you have any idea when the spell is going to wear off?’

‘I’m starting to realise that I should have gotten slightly more information before I decided to start experimenting,’ she says, avoiding the question completely.

I groan. ‘Penny! Not cool! I actually like Baz better this way, but what if he turns against me at any moment? It would be better if we could just turn him back to normal. This is worse than not knowing if he’s off plotting against me.’

She shrugs. ‘Nothing I can do. It has to wear off by itself. Maybe it’s permanent.’

For a brief moment, the idea sounds extremely appealing. ‘No. We can’t do that. It’s not real, it’s not fair on Baz.’

She raises an eyebrow. ‘But you’re enjoying it?’

‘Do you know how many times a day Baz used to take it upon himself to detail all the reasons why I suck? Of course I’m enjoying it!’

‘Snow.’

My back stiffens at the familiar tone, disdain dripping off every letter of my name. I whip around, but it’s only Niall.

‘What do you want?’

‘You to get out of the way. I need to talk to Bunce.’

‘I’m here. Talk,’ Penny says, stepping up beside me.

‘I read through every single page of that damned notebook and I didn’t find a single useful thing about reversing the spell.’

‘Speaking of which, I want that back.’ She holds out her hand as if she expects him to hand her the notebook, and her giant ring glints in reflected light. The gesture is more of an unspoken threat.

‘You can have it back once you cure Baz.’

She shrugs. ‘Haven’t found any cure yet, don’t think I will any time soon.’

‘I thought you might say that, which is why I spelled your precious Chosen One. You better find a way to reverse the spell, or he’ll be stuck under it too.’ With a final sneer, Niall turns and struts away.

Penny groans. ‘I knew it. Simon, are you sure you haven’t felt anything?’

We both look around as if I might suddenly faint at the sight of one of the passing students, but I feel nothing.

‘Nope. Maybe Niall didn’t perform the spell properly.’

‘Maybe,’ Penny says, but she looks doubtful.

‘You really had better try to find a cure,’ I say. I watch a group of eighth year girls walk past… nope. Nothing.

‘I’m going to do some more research,’ she says. ‘I’ll be in the library. I’ve got my suspicions…’

 

***

 

I still haven’t made any progress whatsoever on my own eighth year spell. I’m sitting on my bed now flipping through a book from the library, writing down phrases I might like to try. I look up and watch as the bathroom door handle slowly turns and Baz steps out. His normally perfectly straight hair is wet and curling slightly at the edges and his face is red after being in the hot shower. The book drops silently closed in my lap, making me lose my page, and I can feel the blood rushing to my ears and my heart rattling around like a bird in a tiny cage.

It’s not like I’ve never seen Baz after a shower before.

Oh.

I watch his bare feet walk across the room.

‘Is everything okay, Simon?’ He turns piercing grey eyes on me. They’re not just grey, they’re the aftermath of a storm. It’s not the first time I’ve thought this.

‘Y-yes.’ No. His gaze is making my skin prickle. It’s uncomfortable and exhilarating all at the same time.

I’m under a spell.

It feels nothing like I thought it would.

 

BAZ:

If I’m not careful I’m going to find myself getting used to this. I keep touching his arm, or bumping him with my shoulder (almost like we’re friends) just because I can, because he lets me touch him so casually. I sit next to him when we’re practicing in our room, breathing in the smell of his magic in the air around us, thinking that the real magic is the fact that we’re sitting on the same side of the room, shoulders just barely touching, both smiling.

It won’t last forever; I’ve seen Bunce back at the library, and I rarely see her at Simon’s side anymore. I know this means she’s about to figure something out, and I don’t know what to do when it happens. Simon really doesn’t seem to hate me anymore. Couldn’t we just stay friends?

We’re standing side-by-side by the window, sending shooting stars out into the night.

‘You know Normals make wishes when they see shooting stars,’ he says to me.

‘Did you do that? Before you came here?’

‘I didn’t really see many shooting stars,’ he says. ‘Normals make wishes on other things though. Like the first star that comes out every night.’

‘What did you wish for?’

He shrugs. ‘Silly things mostly, like what we’d have for breakfast the next day.’

I laugh. I shuffle a tiny step closer to him so our arms are glued together.

‘Sometimes not silly things,’ Simon says. ‘I’d wish for a home, or a family. I think… I think I was wishing for here, with you, I just didn’t know it yet.’

‘But you hate me,’ I mumble, leaning closer again.

‘I don’t,’ he whispers. He rests his head on my shoulder. (He fits perfectly.) I feel his curls brushing against my neck. I inhale sharply. ‘Baz…’

‘Simon?’ I whisper. I don’t turn my head; I don’t want him to move.

He swallows, loud enough that I can hear it. He lifts his head and looks at me, and our noses are almost touching. I focus on keeping my eyes on his, resisting the urge to look at his lips.

‘I know this is just a spell, but I…’ He trails off and falls silent.

‘But you what?’ I suddenly desperately need to know what he’s thinking.

Then, unmistakably, his eyes flick down to my lips. My breath catches in my throat.

‘No,’ Simon says, backing away. ‘It’s a spell. It’ll wear off, you’ll hate me. I can’t – I can’t do this.’ He turns and flees the room.

 

SIMON:

Penny, what have you done? And Niall. Curse Niall.

I almost kissed Baz. I  _wanted_  to kiss Baz. (Crowley, I wanted to, so badly.) But when this spell wears off, I’ll be mortified, and Baz will hate me. There’s no need to complicate things further.

It’s strange, when my feelings seem so strong, and alive, and real, even though I know with certainty that I’m under a spell and none of it is real at all.

This isn’t real, I tell myself. It’s a spell. It’s just a spell. I’m not in love with Baz; I hate Baz. (Well, maybe I don’t hate him, I haven’t for a while now, but that’s only because he’s under a spell too.) Living with Baz has been torture for the last seven years. All of this – this – racing heart and blushing and magic rising under my skin and this ridiculous attraction, it means nothing. It’s  _just a spell_.

I repeat this to myself all night.

Baz is in his bed (right there – so very close to me), his back to me. He was already in bed when I finally came back in, though I doubt he’s asleep. I’m lying here tossing and turning in the darkness, watching his dark figure across the room, little more than an arm’s length away.

I fight it. I tell myself it’s not real. It’s just a spell.

 

***

 

‘That is one seriously strong spell, Penny,’ I huff out when I see her at breakfast.

She widens her eyes. ‘What do you mean?’

‘I mean it’s extremely effective. It’s  _torture_.’

‘Uhh…’

I stop and take in Penny’s shocked face. ‘What? What’s wrong?’

‘I need to tell you something about the spell.’

‘What?’

She looks around, making sure we’re out of earshot, and leans in. ‘Look, I’ve been doing a lot of research.’

‘Yes…’

‘About spells, and how to create them and test them, and how to figure out if it’s working.’

‘And…?’ I’m distracted when I see Baz walk in. He catches my eye and looks away quickly, his face flushed.

‘Simon! Are you listening?’

‘Yes,’ I say, turning back to Penny. ‘You’ve been researching spells.’

She rolls her eyes. ‘Listen, I’ve been doing  _a lot_  of research, and I’ve done all sorts of tests and cross-referenced my readings and everything, and I’m really, really very sure that the love spell never worked.’

I frown. ‘Huh?’

‘There is no spell! You’re not under a spell, and neither is Baz. The movie I picked the quote from is probably just too old and no-one talks about it anymore. I was really only testing the phrase that day when I used it on Baz, and I assumed it had worked because of the way he started acting. But it doesn’t. There is no spell.’

‘What – but – it worked, Penny. I can feel it. I would know.’

‘No, Simon, the spell definitely didn’t do anything. If you love Baz, then it’s for real. It’s just you.’

‘No, I’m under a spell,’ I insist. How else can I explain why I get so flustered, dropping things whenever Baz walks into a room, my heart doing summersaults when we make eye contact, not to mention almost kissing him yesterday? Of course I’m under a spell. I hate Baz.

‘Simon,’ she says, fixing me with a stare. ‘Have I ever been wrong before?’

This makes me pause, because she does have a good point.

‘But if there was no spell,’ I stammer, ‘that would mean I actually like Baz. There has to be a spell.’

‘I told you, I was extremely thorough when I tested it out. Though to be honest, I was starting to suspect even before that, back when Niall threatened us. It would explain why neither of you showed signs straight away.’

‘But –’

‘Don’t worry, Si,’ she says, grinning. ‘He feels the same way about you, clearly. I don’t see what the problem is.’

I look across the room where Baz is sitting with his friends.

Then it really hits me.

Baz has been in love with me the whole time. And it’s not a spell.

 

BAZ:

‘Can we talk? In private?’ Simon mumbles, not meeting my eyes.

I nod, and follow him up to our room. He’s been talking to Bunce. Maybe she’s found a way to reverse the spell.

Simon closes the door behind me and goes to sit on his bed, then stands up again. He still hasn’t met my eyes.

‘I have to confess something,’ he says.

‘Okay.’ I don’t dare to let myself imagine what it might be.

‘Penny made a spell. For the eighth year assignment,’ he stammers. ‘A love spell.’

I nod. ‘Yes.’

‘Yes?’ He frowns. ‘She used it on you – it was my idea, I’m sorry,’ he says, his words faltering.

Is this the part where he tells me she’s found a cure?

‘But then,’ he continues, ‘Niall found out and stole her notebook and tried to use the spell on me.’

I take a step back.

So that’s what this is about – and that explains what almost happened between us yesterday.

‘I’m going to kill Niall,’ I whisper.

‘But, um,’ Simon says, swallowing, ‘here’s the thing.’

He takes two steps over to me and takes my hand. He still hasn’t looked me in the eyes.

‘There was never any spell. Penny says she tested it and it doesn’t work. So I guess, I, uh, I guess that means, I like you.’

‘Oh,’ I whisper.

‘But then…’ He frowns and drops my hand. His eyes finally flick up and meet mine. ‘No, that makes no sense. Why would you just start liking me the day after Penny cast the spell? Shit, there is a spell, shit, I’m sorry.’ He runs a hand through his hair, messing up his curls. ‘I’m terrified you’ll go back to hating me.’

I shake my head. ‘Simon, I knew about the spell. I’ve been in love with you since fifth year. I just used the spell as an excuse to start acting like it.’

He gapes at me. ‘You knew all along?’

I’m smiling now. ‘Yeah. I mean, I didn’t know Niall had tried to use it on you, but I saw Bunce casting it on me. I let her do it because I thought it might help me get over you.’

He laughs – something between a laugh and a giggle. ‘Really?’

‘It didn’t work,’ I say. ‘Obviously.’ I reach for the back of his head and lean forward until my forehead rests against his. ‘Are you sure you’re not under a spell? Maybe it worked on you because you weren’t already in love?’

He shakes his head, and I feel his hand on my waist, like he’s steadying himself.

‘I think I was. I just needed the spell so I could admit it to myself without it being too horrifying.’

‘Gee. Thanks,’ I say sarcastically.

He’s playing with my hair. I sigh, and pull him closer.

‘Baz…’

‘Simon?’

‘Here,’ he says, and kisses me.

 

SIMON:

His hair is softer than I imagined it would be. (And yes. I imagined it, long before Penny’s spell.) His mouth is cold against my skin, but gentle, and I can feel him smiling as he kisses me back. It still feels like I must be under a spell. This is nothing short of magic.

 

PENNY:

I check in on Simon after getting my notebook back from Dev and Niall.

Crowley, what did I just see?

I shut the door and run back down the stairs.


End file.
